I've given up on the sounds....

I'm about 15pages into What's So Amazing About Grace? and I already have to take a break. The whole time I'm reading, I'm thinking "Gosh, I'm so AWFUL at giving grace. I need to do this better. Gosh I'm just awful." So I thought I would actually interact as I read this book and let you know how it's breaking me down and building me up again.
Yancey quotes David Seamands:

Many years ago I was driven to the conclusion that the two major causes of most emotional problems among evangelical Christians are these: the failure to understand, receive, and live out God's unconditional grace and forgiveness; and the failure to give out that unconditional love forgiveness, and grace to other people.... We read, we hear, we believe a good theology of grace. But that's not the way we live. The good news of the Gospel of grace has not penetrated the level of our emotions.

Yup, that's what got me. I believe a good theology of grace. I can lay down a chart or list for you of God's grace in my life and in general. Somewhere along the way it is ingrained in most Christians' heads. The part that is most heartwrenching for me, is that live out section. But that's not the way we live. Bam! Right in the face. We don't live in accordance to what we believe. Then to make matters worse, I was reading a blog of a woman struggling with grumbling, and the passage that convicted her came up to convict me as I was reading this. Titus 1:16- They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. Ouch! Another one right there. I always forget I will be known by my actions, not by what I believe. People can't see inside me. I have to live in a way that is honoring to God and shows His grace in order for people to know what I believe.